I just had a small (but meaningful) "aha" moment.
I've been working at my current job for almost 1.5 years now. During that time, I have been attempting to provide customer service regarding a database of some pretty detailed and technical information.
If I'm honest, I have been hoping this whole time that said database responsibility would be taken away from me, so I only paid enough attention to get by and do a decent job. Now that my responsibilities have doubled (vs shrink as I'd hoped) I am taking more ownership and thus, paying a bit more attention.
Mind you, all that I'm doing is Greek to me because I'm dealing with codes and numbers for items that have no relationship for me. There is one person (I call her the Queen or Goddess) who has been here so long that she can rattle off what something is based on a random part number. (We should sell tickets!) OK, maybe not ticket worthy, but when you are the new kid on the block, someone with that level of information in their brain and a willingness to share it is a Godsend!
My a-ha moment was relating a part to the whole and realizing the relationship. It's one small step for admin-kind, but I have a feeling the additional learning needed to (dare I say it?) master this database will be faster in coming. It's the kind of learning that grows exponentially.
God is like this too. He teaches us what we can comprehend bit by bit stretching us (stretching me) to reach the next point in our relationship. There are mountaintop experiences where I can look back and see all that God & I have accomplished and appreciate how far I've come. Where I can drink in God in all His glory through something I've personally experienced. I LOVE THOSE TIMES! They are important and necessary because other times I feel like I can barely see my next move. I'm pressed up against a mountain and while I am currently holding tight, I don't know which arm to reach out with, how far I have to stretch before I grab the rocks above me and pull myself up/forward. (OK, I've never been mountain climbing and honestly, I'm not wild about sports analogies, but...if I put this in emotional terms we'd be here forever.)
I see that while I often want God to lay out His plan for me so I can see all of it; God doesn't do that because I cannot handle it. I'm not ready because without the experiences of tomorrow and next year I cannot imagine the journey 5 years from now. God wants my faith. He wants my trust in Him. He wants a relationship with me that draws me to Him daily, not just in my times of need. It is the relationship building that allows me to climb higher, to attain God's plan for me. He tells me He can do immeasurably more than anything I can ask or imagine. (Eph 3:20)
God builds upon my experiences, upon my faith, each day.
Which makes me ask myself...what am I asking or imagining from God?
Am I putting the time into my relationship with Him so that I can climb higher?
And I didn't even need a 2x4 for this one!